Guess What?!?

Finding Shemballah, Book 2 in the Chronicles of Nequam, is now available on Amazon! And can I say that it feels soooo good to finally have it out there? Getting it to this point was a little easier than publishing Laryn Rising, mostly because I at least this time I kind of knew what I was doing. (Or, more precisely, I knew which things I couldn't do myself and who would do them for me...)

Now that the book is out and I can relax, I've been looking back over this journey with some bitter-sweet feelings. I admit it, I love Laryn. I wish I were more like her (and no, despite what my mother might say we are nothing alike). Regardless of how exciting it was to finally write 'The End' for book two, it's been hard to say goodbye to these characters. As I've mentioned before, my current project is juvenile fiction and although I'm having a blast writing it, I truly loved the emotional intensity of writing Laryn. With that said, I thought it would be fun to share some of the inside story behind the writing of these two books, so here we go...


Ten Random Facts About Finding Shemballah:
1. I never intended for Laryn's story to take two books.

2. You know the 'Big Decision' Laryn has to make in Laryn Rising? It was never part of the original storyline. When I realized there was no way Laryn and her sisters could assimilate fast enough to get them off the ship according to plan (i.e., without ending up with a giant, doorstop-sized tome), I had to scramble, rethink, and risk ruining everything in order to split the story into two books and make a complete story out of their journey to Nequam. In the end, I think it was the best decision I made.

3. Inventing a new planet is kind of hard. Don't believe me? Stop right now and see how long it takes you to design, AND NAME, three alien species. Go ahead and try it. If you have any success, leave your new creations (with full details) in the comment box because I'd love to see them. Let's just say I have a whole new respect for the writers of Star Wars, lol.

4. Plymouth was originally named Republic (hence the name for the colonial money being 'pubs', which is short for publicans), but then some astute readers pointed out that I had 'Republic' and 'The Federation', which was a bit too Star-Wars-ish. I still like Republic better, and I never did get used to calling the people of Plymouth 'Plymouthans', although that is the accepted name for 'People from Plymouth'. Who knew?

5. Alistair is my favorite character in Finding Shemballah. (Aside from Laryn, of course.)

6. When I realized I could no longer call book two Republic (see fun fact #4) I almost named it Promise Bound. But despite the great reviews I got on that option, it sounded too much like the title of a cheesy romance to me, and every time I considered it Fabio appeared in my head...

7. I have eleven full revisions of Finding Shemballah. Seriously.

8. The first draft was almost 250,000 words long. The final is around 170,000, which means I cut EIGHTY THOUSAND WORDS!!! out of this manuscript. (I hope all my editing clients read this. It might make them feel better, lol.)

9. There is a map for this book, but since I drew it myself it kind of looks like a 5th grader's geography project. Needless to say, it isn't currently included. Unfortunately, I have no idea where to go to find a map drawing person (cartographer?), so until I figure that out this book will remain mapless. This kind of makes me really sad because I LOVE maps! I even have a whole pinterest board dedicated solely to really cool book maps. (Does that make me weird?)

10. The inspiration for this entire series came from laziness. I love historical fiction. I love stories about American colonial life and all the challenges and adventures that went along with leaving the known for the unknown, and I always wanted to write historical fiction. Then I went to college, majored in History, realized how much research a person would have to do to write successful historical fiction, and promptly started trying to figure out a way to write history without all the research. Besides that, the idea of people from the future having to live in a pastoral world kind of captivated me. In the end, however, creating a whole world and all the creatures and places in it wasn't nearly as easy as I thought it would be, and there were days when I was absolutely positive that there wasn't another name, description, or 'fun fact' about Nequam in my head. Period. But in the end, I managed to come up with a story that, to me, illustrates that when push comes to shove human beings are amazingly strong and resilient, and as a society they will nearly always rise to the occasion.

Thank you to everyone who has shared Laryn's story with me, and to all the people who helped me along the way! I appreciate every time my books are reviewed, pinned, shared, tweeted, emailed, or talked about, because without all of that no one would even know they exist. Such is the world of the self-published, but I truly believe that if a book is good enough the world will find it.

For First-Time Authors: What to Cut on that First Round of Revisions (Part I: Anecdotes and Incidental Scenes and Events)

This can feel like a daunting task. By the time you’ve finished your manuscript it’s like another reality in your brain. You created it, and did not do so randomly but with great purpose. There was a reason for every word you wrote, and more than likely you still remember what most of those reasons were. This is generally the biggest stumbling block for authors on that first revision, but there are some considerations that can help when it comes time to cut the excess material from your manuscript.

The first consideration is to accept that there is excessive material in your manuscript. They say there is an exception to every rule, but I have yet to meet the exception to this one. Yes, there was a purpose for each and every word, but while all that information might have been important for the author, it isn’t all important for the reader.

Think of it this way: a novel is like a sculpture. It’s a finely honed piece of art that has to be carved from an existing chunk of material, and that first draft is the chunk of material you’ll be carving from. As the author there are things you need to put into that original chunk – backstory, conversations, minor incidents, general information and exposition, anecdotes, etc. – to help you understand the story you’re telling. A lot of that, however, can be condensed, woven through, summarized, or cut altogether, because in its entirety it’s too much. Too clunky, too heavy, and too expansive to create that perfect sculpture you’re visualizing in your mind.

On subsequent novels these things become easier to differentiate, but on that first attempt it can be very difficult to decipher the essential from the excess. Every author knows scenes that fail to move the story forward should be cut, but the first-time author is often left asking what that actually means. I remember asking that question myself regarding certain scenes that I felt offered necessary information or depth to my story, but that my editor felt were excessive and unnecessary. In the end she was right at least 90% of the time. Almost all of those scenes came out of the book, and instead I found ways to preserve the ideas or information that were actually critical to my story.

Some cuts are difficult to determine without outside critique, but other elements are fairly easy to isolate, analyze, and cut with confidence. The two that we’ll be looking at in this post are Anecdotes, and Incidental Scenes/Events.

·       Anecdotes

For the purposes of this discussion an ‘anecdote’ is a retelling or narrative of an interesting or amusing incident, often in the form of an aside or backstory.

These can be funny, poignant, amusing, telling, and often reveal important information about the main character. In pure anecdotal form, however, they are also almost always expendable.

The argument can be made that books revolve around anecdotes, but this is only true when the author uses the interesting and/or amusing incidents as main events in their plot. When used only to demonstrate ‘something that happened’ outside the main storyline, they often fail to contribute anything critical to the plot.

Sometimes anecdotes are included as flashbacks, and sometimes a character actually tells another character what happened. Either way, if you have a scene where your mc ‘remembers when’ and then recounts the entire incident, it should probably go. If the info is legitimately important, find a different way to incorporate it – summarize, put the critical details in dialogue, have another character question your mc about it – or see if you can do without it after all.

·       Incidental Scenes and Events

A scene or event is considered incidental if it serves only to further define or clarify, amuse the reader, or support a theme of the book.

In my first draft of Laryn Rising, there was scene where Laryn and her sisters went to the cafeteria kitchen for their first day of work. They arrived knowing nothing about ‘real food’, and during the scene they smelled their first onion, tasted their first cookie, and interacted with Wanda, the very large woman in charge of the kitchen who also happens to be one of my favorite characters. I loved this scene. It was interesting and enlightening, and it showcased the assimilation process of Laryn and her sisters, which is one of the main themes of the book. Unfortunately, it also slowed down the pace because nothing important happened here. There was nothing new for the reader to learn, it simply highlighted an interesting aspect of the story. There was no conflict, and the scene did not require a meaningful reaction or decision from any of my characters. It had to go.

While anecdotes and incidental scenes are some of the easiest elements to identify, isolate, and cut, they also tend to be some of the most difficult to let go. As stated earlier, we like these scenes. Often times, we learned the most about our characters by delving into their pasts or watching what they would do in normal, everyday situations. But don’t let this fool you into thinking that your readers need to see them as well. Instead, trust that the depth of characterization that happened as you developed these scenes will carry through every other aspect of your character, and let them go. I promise, it really will improve your book. Besides, there’s no need for great scenes to be wasted. We all love the ‘deleted scenes’ from our favorite movies, and books are no different, so save yours and post them on your book blog. They’ll make a great fan feature, and every reader who fell in love with your characters will be thrilled to discover them.

(Click here for What to Cut Part II: Plot Spurs)

The Importance of Outside Critique for First-Time Authors

Let me start by saying that if you’re someone who’s vehemently opposed to critique groups -- or carting multiple copies of your manuscript to someone else’s living room where it may undergo public humiliation at the hands of the half dozen others in said group -- don’t panic. There are other options, I promise. Either way, outside constructive critique is something that every manuscript – particularly every first manuscript – needs.

Why is outside critique necessary?

Because as a first time author you need someone to help you see how well you have (or haven’t)
incorporated all that knowledge of ‘the craft’ into this first manuscript. You’re confident that your attempts at ‘showing’ aren’t ‘telling’ in disguise? You believe your understanding and use of plot-driving conflict is solid and effectively used? You’re positive that the threads of your story are well-integrated and essential to your main conflict and character development? You can’t find any place where your pace lags, and you’re certain there’s no ‘sagging middle’? Great! Maybe you’re right.

But maybe you’re wrong.

I can’t count the number of times a first-time author has said, “But I thought I was ‘showing’,” or “But that scene has to be there so the reader will know _____ about my main character,” or “But that thread adds humor because the aunt is funny,” or (possibly the most common) “You think it’s slow/boring/confusing/hard-to-get-through? But I think that [whole giant bulk of the middle] is so interesting! And the reader has to know all of that or there’s no point to the story.”

I don’t know why these things are so difficult to see in a first manuscript, but for some reason they are. Unfortunately, they’re also very difficult to hear, but hearing them is essential since often times we just can’t see them ourselves. New authors may ‘sense’ that something isn’t right, or that they aren’t quite accomplishing what they set out to accomplish, but usually the reasons triggering these instincts are almost impossible to ferret out alone.

Enter the Critique Group.

Or, more loosely termed, the writer or writers who look at your manuscript and tell you where you’ve succeeded and where you’ve failed. The varied critique gained from an actual group of writers can be a very valuable thing (especially since it’s usually accompanied with the opportunity to critique their work as well, which opens up a world’s worth of new insight on how to interpret a manuscript – all of which is sure to help in your own revisions) but sometimes multiple opinions can be a lot for a new author to process. Either way, someone knowledgeable needs to review your manuscript.

When is the best time for outside critique?

I recommend doing one big revision on your own, focusing on your pace and cutting excess material from your manuscript. And be brutal. Saving your original always makes this less stressful, and by all means create a file for everything you delete if that helps. I think I took a whopping 15,000 words out of my first behemoth of a manuscript all by myself. I was so proud. I felt so ruthless. And in the end, even though it was a mere fraction of the 70,000 words that would eventually be stripped from my ms (that’s SEVENTY. THOUSAND. WORDS. in case you think you read it wrong) taking out that initial 15,000 helped get me in the proper state of mind for purging my story of its unnecessary parts and pieces.

Cutting and condensing really does require a certain state of mind, and forcing yourself to take those first cuts is an important step in the right direction. If you really aren't sure what to take out start small, but start somewhere. And when you've taken out everything you can possibly justify, know that it was just the tip of the iceberg and get ready to listen to, and appreciate, the suggestions on your first real critique.

What qualifies as ‘Outside Critique’?

Or, perhaps more importantly, what doesn’t? In my opinion, anyone predisposed to wade through and like your manuscript simply because it was written by you does not count as outside critique. Mothers commonly fall under this category, however, I do not believe in excluding anyone simply because of their relationship to you. It has much more to do with the inclinations and qualities someone possesses than it does with how well they know and love you.

For instance, my mother would not wade through or love my book just because I wrote it. On the other hand, she also doesn’t have the knowledge or inclination to read something that needs work or tell me how to fix it, so she still would not be a candidate for a first critique. Three of my sisters are actually the first people to ever look at anything I write. One of them reads every word along the way, disqualifying her for the job of outside critique because she’s already ‘invested’ in my characters and plot. The second reads for me after I’ve done my own first round of cutting and tightening, but she’s easy to please and not at all opinionated, so she too is disqualified for giving outside critique.

Then there’s my sister Annie. She’s super qualified. (Almost regretfully so, as illustrated by the 70,000 word elimination previously mentioned.) In the first place, she’s a writer (although she’s not a novelist – yet). In the second, she’s opinionated. And in the third, I know she’ll tell me what she thinks and have insight for me when it comes to fixing the problems. Tough love can be hard to take, but this is what you’re looking for when the time comes for knowledgeable feedback on your manuscript. It can be brutal, it will most likely be painful, but it is essential.

You may not have a sister (or mother, or friend) who possesses the right qualities for outside critique, but I suspect that somewhere amidst your acquaintances is another novelist. (Seriously, they’re everywhere. Just start casually mentioning that you’ve got a manuscript, and people will start confessing.) Trading critiques with another writer is a great option, and is mutually beneficial to both authors. Just make sure not to get caught in the trap of being mutually ‘nice’, as this isn’t beneficial to anyone. If there isn’t a suitable author available, keep looking. The first person who ever critiqued any of my writing was an old high school teacher, and almost everyone knows someone who knows enough about writing to make an effective critique partner.

If all else fails, there are writing groups. There are also online writing forums and other online resources for connecting with other authors and critique groups. Be creative, find something that will work for you, and don’t make the mistake of forgoing this important step in developing your first manuscript. Solid, knowledgeable critique is an essential step in turning any manuscript into a polished, sharp, well-paced novel.

What Am I Thinking?

Remember how I keep saying I'm going to publish Laryn Rising any minute? The goal has been September 1st for quite some time.

Newsflash: That is today. Needless to say, my book is not quite ready due to a little thing called cover art (which could come through ANY MINUTE!) and I've been waiting around with my revised, copy-edited, totally-perfected final version, just waiting to go. And apparently I've been waiting around too long, because I was suddenly struck with a kind-of significant addition/revision that I now feel compelled to make. Could it complicate things? Possibly. Could it cause me to have to reread the entire second half of the book AGAIN in order to make sure the new addition fits in seamlessly? Definitely. Could I lose my mind if I actually have to go over all of that for the seven millionth time? Very possibly. So why am I going to do it?

Because this is such a no-brainer that I really can't believe I didn't see it in the original write. Seriously. I have this issue with this character that has been a problem since the first major shift in my original plotline. I have spent many hours trying to come up with a way to resolve this issue with no success, while all the time the answer was so obvious! So now I have to do it. There simply is no choice, because if I don't I'll always know that I should have. *sigh*

And so, the moral of this story is that sometimes being forced to step back and ruminate over something you think is perfectas good as you can make it can be a good thing. I've done quite a bit of freelance editing, and one thing I have learned is that while there is definitely such a thing as over-thinking, there is also a time and place for re-thinking. The trick is deciphering between the two. Every author knows that there are an infinite number of ways to write a story. At any point in any plot, you could turn your book over to someone else and more than likely it would end up looking a lot different than your version. An editor, for example, constantly has to examine the difference between structural suggestions and opinion suggestions - otherwise the editor is simply trying to create their own version of the author's story. It can be a hard call to make, and I think every editor - and consequently every author - has dealt with some frustration in drawing this line.

For me, I have a simple little rule I use to help me decide when to rewrite/revise, and when to step away and call it good enough. If the scene/chapter/story is already working but I'm agonizing over whether or not it's 'good enough', I ask myself this question: Will changing it make it better? Or will it simply be a different version of the same? Often times the answer is obvious - as with this current change that I'm about to institute. It will tie off a loose end, pull together two threads that need another connection in the story, and it will add a definite level of intensity and emotion to a pinnacle moment in my main character's personal evolution. It is a vertical change that will definitely make the scene/book better.

The scene in question has to do with my character receiving some critical information that changes the course of the entire story. Currently she gets the info from a group of nameless women in an overheard conversation. The transfer of this info has always been a fairly week point, but up until my grand inspiration it seemed as good as anything else. Were I to consider changing it so that she was in a different location, or heard it from a different group of fairly neutral people, the change would be lateral - and therefore kind of pointless. But now the bearer of the said tidings will be my character's nemesis rather than some neutral party, which gives me confidence that this move will be vertical - not lateral.

In this particular instance the answer to my question was very clear, but sometimes that is not the case. Sometimes you really can't tell what changes a revision/addition will bring about without sitting down and trying out your idea. In this case I think it's good to remember that just because you're considering a change - and even taking a stab at it - it doesn't mean you have to commit yourself. In every manuscript I have worked on I have made at least one major change to my story line at some point... And I've attempted several more, only to decide that what I had in the first place was better.

I could probably go on for about four more pages on the subject of how-to-tell-where-a-revision-will-take you, (which I consider a kind of fascinating subject) but, as that is not the topic of this particular post, I will spare you. For now. Suffice it to say that I'm thrilled with this latest burst of inspiration, I have no doubt it will make my book better than it was, and I am now officially glad that my book wasn't ready to go out because otherwise I'd have felt like it was too late to make the change - although I'd never have thought I'd be happy to be revising this late in the game...